Ekhart Toll said “if you can recognize illusions as illusions, they dissolve”
So What exactly is an illusion, and how can it be recognized for it to vanish?
As per definition, Illusions are distortions of the senses.
They are described to be the misinterpretations of a true sensation.
So basically here for my salvation, I need to admit that what I’m feeling is not real and does not truly exist.
But how is it that the more I realize the degree of this surreal situation I am in, the more I find myself wanting it?
As if I’m trapped in quicksand and the more I fight to get out, the deeper my heart and soul sink into it.
It is known that it is far harder to kill a phantom than a reality.
And maybe that is simply what’s happening to me…
In my mind, I have created the perfect image of a man that I can’t stop thinking about.
No matter what I’m doing, he’s the master of my thoughts.
Every waking hour and even in my deepest sleeps I long for him and belong to him.
It all started as he entered my life in the hardest of times.
He came like the rain in a drought and flooded my existence into an ever flowing river cutting its way through the dead and spreading life where hope was lost.
He was the long awaited oasis of the walkers of the deserts.
But now that I’ve arrived to that green spot in the dry sands, to the tranquility and peace in my heart and look around, it all of a sudden disappears and leaves me questioning…
Was it all just a dream?
It can’t be!
I’m sure that even if my eyes dare to fool me, his smell lingers in me and the touch of his skin against mine is the only thing that assured me that life is still worth living!
As I get closer and closer I wonder, how far away am I really? Maybe light years apart?
My feeling is sure of the beauty of every moment but using logic tells me that maybe he’s just a magical mirage of my own creation for I have a mind that is worse than Amsterdam mushrooms.
What is this really?
A mirage? The unrealistic hope or wish that cannot be attained.
Or is he my oasis? My peace amidst all this madness.
How about both? Could he possibly be the oasis and the mirage?